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Forced Marriage Bihar #PakaruahShaadi #JabariaShaadi

Groom kidnapping, then forced on gun point to marry to bride is a popular phenomenon in the western parts of Bihar, and eastern Uttar Pradesh states in India. It is colloquially known as Pakaruah shaadi or Jabaria shaadi wherein eligible bachelors are abducted by the bride's family and later forcefully married. It is done to avoid heavy dowry costs.

Suddenly why I am focused on the Pakaruah shaadi or Jabaria shaadi and make a video on it. There is a reason. You have to watch the video to knowing it.

I still remember an event which occured in my childhood time regarding forced marriage.

By birth I am a city boy i.e. I born in a city, did schooling in a city, spent times in city, started my first job in a city, everything in different cities. Hence I am having less knoweldge about traditions, life style including politics of the village. But something happens which I still remember.

My father used to travel to a village frequently because he was born in the village. His travels gave him opportunities to meet his childhood friends and managing the fields which he had rented to workers for performing agricultur related works on 50-50% production sharing.

In summer when our schools were closed, we also travelled with him every year for viewing the village and enjoying the village life style for two weeks, thus maintaining the relation with village.

Summer is a good period for organizing marriage in the village. In our village, we were always invited for attending the marriage party. I also attended many.

In village the marriage is like a big festival. Whole village supports the groom and bride family with food materials, food preparation, bed, coversheets etc so that they can attend very well the invited people coming from outside.

Now the time to tell you what I have seen one day.

Close to my house in the village there is a temple. Family and friends has to visit the temple with the groom or bride to perform some ritual steps of the marriage. From the roof of our house we can see the gathering and dance etc.

One year I saw people are shouting and dancing on very loud music. I requested one of my nephews to show me what was going on the temple. We went there. I saw quite interesting event which I still remember after so many years of my life.

Groom was weeping. Bride was smilling. Many people was forcely helding the groom and asking him to perform whatever prist was telling to perform for the marriage. He was bound to perform. Not only men, women were also participating in forcing him for perfoming the ritual steps of the marriage.

It was quite interesting that the women were saying him "Donot weep. It is your marriage. Nothing will happen.".

I was a child, hence I could not understand very well what was going on. But I was supprised because most of marriage parties which I attended, I had seen that the groom and bride both were smilling and in happy mood. Except, in next day morning family of bride wept along the bride when she was leaving the house to go to the groom house. But here the groom was weeping.

After so many years I come to know now that that was the Pakaruah shaadi or Jabaria shaadi.

What do you think the Pakaruah or Jabaria shaadi is good for the society?

Do you know any such case? 

If you are trapped in the Pakaruah or Jabaria shaadi what you will do?

You can write your answer in comment section.

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